I watched their indoctrination from across the hallway in a dazed-but-fascinated stupor. I didn't quite know what to make of this kind of hero worship. I just knew that my brothers were pretty cool... so I kind of assumed that their KISS fetish was cool too?
Hey, that was my "normal". Don't judge.
At one point in the late 1970s, I think it was reported that KISS actually had the world's 5th largest army after the US, USSR, South Korea and Iraq.
Impressive.
Thank God my brothers never actually had to go to battle though... Even though they had cool uniforms (3/4 sleeve concert t-shirts, tight jeans and pooka shell necklaces) they would have been woefully unprepared for a real fight. Their meager weaponry would have only included:
1) A cardboard Gene Simmons Battle Axe Bass.
2) A fanatical ability to scream "I... ... WANNA ROCK AND ROLL ALL NIGHT... ... AND PARTY EV-UH-REE DAY!!!" like crazed bozos.
3) And a pervasive-but-vague, homoerotic love for big-haired men in greasepaint, medieval battle gear, high heeled boots and tight trousers. If you can call that a weapon.
At the time, I really wished that I was older... so that I could have answered the call. I wanted to do my part. I wanted to join my brothers in whatever fight the KISS ARMY was preparing for. But I was just a kid... to0 young for the army.
My destiny didn't include joining the army. Any army.
Looking back, I now see the debt my brothers paid for me. Their commitment to something much, much larger than themselves. I honor their service. Are they heroes or were they just doing their job? I suppose we each have to answer that question for ourselves, in the quiet of our own hearts.
I know what I think.
I'm just glad they got out alive.
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3 comments:
Brother!
I gotta thank you!
I was retired.
I was sitting on my duff
getting flabby and outa-shape,
not doin' my part.
After all, I put in a sweaty 4+
year tour of duty with my band of brothers between 1977 - 1980.
Ahhh! The memories are flowing over me. There we were on the banks of some MeKong-Florida-esque
tributary feeding into the mighty Gulf of Mexico (skippin school) in the blazin' summer sun with shirts off, warm miller light, gold bud wafts of smoke, and well used ball-bearing wheeled skateboards (even before Red Ryder's came out)in the trunk. Our armored vehicle was Steve's bondo-covered grey mustang with grotesque Mags, tiny front tires, jacked high as kingdom-come in the rear. This wasn't a car. This was a throne. And we were the few, the proud, dressed to kill and on a mission (to get stoned). On the hood of our proto-hummer was emblazoned "KISS"~ in great big bold spray-paint black for all the women (and lesser dancing men) to see. Loud and proud baby! It's a wonder I can still hear at all today.
But I digress,... It's been many years since I served my country, but after seeing the video "Detroit Rock City",....
...................and seeing (i'm tearing up! Damn you.).. Commander Simmons do the mega squats,..
...........
..................all i can say is,..
.>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
I'M BACK!! I'm Reenlistin'
If you did further research on this topic, you would find out that one of your brothers was honorably discharged from the Kiss Army due to his incessant air drumming of
Rush 2112. I only know this because I was discharged on the very same day for an equally offensive act, I could not stop singing James Taylor's "Up on the Roof". It clearly states in section 3 of the bylaws of Kiss Army's Rules of engagement on and off base, that no
soldier will hum, tap, drum, sing any other music than that of it's leaders. So sorry to bust your story in half. There is only one brother who deserves to be known as a KISS ARMY SOLDIER. You can most probably figure out which brother was the drummer and which was the homoerotic lover of big haired men with makeup.
Sincerely,
Peter Valduchi'
Ohmygosh!
The gene pool was evidently drained
Dry
Babay
Dry
and to think they were once(a very loong time ago) such cute little tykes!
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