Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Swim Update #4

Just got back from another swim workout... I was thinking about writing this blog WHILE doing my swim workout. Does that make me a SWIM NERD or a WRITING NERD? Or probably just an all-around, all-American MEGA-DORK. Oh well... I make no apologies. I yam what I yam.

Up until a month or so ago, I would describe what I did when fully submerged in water as "not drowning"... or "avoiding a watery death". I feel safe in saying that where I'm headed, with a lot more training, will eventually be described as "swimming". At this point, where I am TODAY would be somewhere in between not drowing and swimming.

THE GOOD NEWS: My form is definitely better. I have moments where I feel pretty fluid every workout now. I feel like I'm snowplowing through the water less. Also, I'm resting less between laps... In general, the orchestra that is my swimming form is still like a bunch of drunk 4 year olds trying to play Beethoven's 5th... but much less of one than 3 weeks ago! I can sort of feel the different parts coming together... synching up.

THE BAD NEWS: I'm still resting between laps. I think I'm swimming too hard still... and too inefficiently. Plus, swimming is just a different kind of cardio workout, I think. I'm hoping it just takes a little while to get used to it and adapt. Oh, also, I tend to sink a little bit when I turn to breath (right or left side). What's up with that? Probably a form thing.

Perhaps there's a psychological underpinning to this stuff... maybe I could be a pioneer in swim-based psychotherapy. Instead of getting on the couch, you'd get in the pool. Your hydro-therapist would analyze your stroke... "You kick is weak... This tells me something about your relationship with your father..." or "You sink when you breath... What is this "sinking feeling" all about? Hmmm???" or "Your inability to do the breast stroke reveals major issues with women..." etc, etc, etc.

Okay. I'm ending this right now...


Monday, May 28, 2007

Bolder Boulder

Just got back from running the Boulder Bolder. It was fun. Kind of a hassle, but fun. 50,000+ runners descended onto Boulder for the 10K. They had bands and belly dancers along the way, as usual. I ran past a guy (I think it was a guy) in a full-on Scooby Doo costume. They definitely have that race down to a science though. They "processed" us through the route without any hitches or delays. Man. I'm slow! I wanted to run it in under an hour. I snuck in at 59:31. Phew. The last several hundred yards of the race yakes you up a little hill into Folsom Field. Kind of creates a little "chariots of fire" moment... um, if you're someone with an overactive imagination.

Sunday, May 27, 2007

Memorial Day...

My good friend, Ed Skibbe, just emailed this to me. Happy Memorial Day.

READY TO KILL

TEN minutes now I have been looking at this.
I have gone by here before and wondered about it.
This is a bronze memorial of a famous general
Riding horseback with a flag and a sword and a revolver
on him.
I want to smash the whole thing into a pile of junk to be
hauled away to the scrap yard.
I put it straight to you,
After the farmer, the miner, the shop man, the factory
hand, the fireman and the teamster,
Have all been remembered with bronze memorials,
Shaping them on the job of getting all of us
Something to eat and something to wear,
When they stack a few silhouettes
Against the sky
Here in the park,
And show the real huskies that are doing the work of
the world, and feeding people instead of butchering them,
Then maybe I will stand here
And look easy at this general of the army holding a flag
in the air,
And riding like hell on horseback
Ready to kill anybody that gets in his way,
Ready to run the red blood and slush the bowels of men
all over the sweet new grass of the prairie.

---- Carl Sandburg, Chicago Poems

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

New song...

into the light
may 21-22, 2007

there are so many words you feel you have to say
there are so many bad scenes but still you won't walk away
you're stuck in this movie, even though it breaks your heart
throws you down into the hole, makes you scared of the dark

gonna pull you into the light, oh yeh
gonna pull you into the light, oh yeh
gonna pull you into the light, and hold you tight
hold you so tight

I would never pretend to know what it took
to make you who you are, but the way you look right now
sitting there in a deep dark shade…
you're clearly caught in these traps you've made

gonna pull you into the light, oh yeh
gonna pull you into the light, oh yeh
gonna pull you into the light, and hold you tight
hold you so tight

I've been caught too
and I would've never made it through
if two arms had not found me
and put themselves around me
pulled me up
up into the universal soul
helped me climb my way out
of the hole

there's so much weight that you don't have to pull
let me unhook you baby so you can roam
go find that place, where you know you belong
leave these tired stories and just move on…

gonna pull you into the light, oh yeh
gonna pull you into the light, oh yeh
gonna pull you into the light, and hold you tight
hold you so tight

Friday, May 18, 2007

Ah...

Today's swim... Not feelin' fishy.


So I was supposed to do 20 laps today (1000 meters). I completed 16 laps before lane swimming (or whatever it's called) finished... Then, all at once, 35 little kids jumped in the pool in FULL ON PARTY RAGE MODE and saved me from the water buffalo ballet that i was starring in. I thought, "I should swim my remaining 4 laps through these little monsters -- it will be good training for swimming in a churning reservoir with 150 amped up triathletes". But alas, I was pretty much wasted tired from snow-plowing through the water for my previous inelegant 16 laps.

Confession #1: I had to stop after every single LENGTH to catch my breath. sometimes, for a full minute or more.

Confession #2: Oddly, I felt the most graceful and easy when I was doing the "catchup drill". Is that supposed to make you feel the glide or something? Because I did.

Confession #3: For some reason, when I breathe on the left side, I get water in my mouth and start to freak out a little (just a little). When I breathe on the right side, I'm fine.

Confession #4: Swimming 750 meters non-stop feels like an impossible goal to me at this moment. But hey, we put a man on the moon. We taught apes sign language. We invented polyester. Surely we can get John around a buoy and back to shore safely, right?

Messy Mind

One day in the car, she said, "I'm messy in the mind..." I thought to myself, "Yes darling. Yes, you are. It will be our undoing..."

And I also thought, "That's a great line..."


messy mind
april 21, 2007 and may 11, 2007

I'd crawl up a mountain of broken glass
just to get an afternoon of your time
oh I would do much more than that…
but girl you've got a messy mind
oh girl it's so messy in your mind

I'd learn chinese and cut all my hair
I'd read you books 'til I'm blind
oh I would do much more than that…
but girl you've got a messy mind, oh yeh
oh girl it's so messy in your mind

it's so easy to get lost up there
behind your pretty face
underneath your curly hair
what should I do, all I want is you?
but girl you've got a messy mind

solo over verse

I'd shut my mouth and let your steer
I'd even write a song that rhymed
I'd do it all if that's what it took
but girl you've got a messy mind, oh yeh
oh girl you're so messy in the mind

instrumental

somewhere along the way you jailed your heart
you think that loving is a crime
now I know that I can't win
cause girl you've got a messy mind, oh yeh
oh girl it's so messy in your mind

it's so easy to get lost up there
behind your pretty face
underneath your curly hair
it's a bitter cost, but I just keep getting lost
'cause girl you've got a messy mind

Thursday, May 17, 2007

I don't want to grow up to be a stupid white guy.

I'm sitting at a coffee shop. It's 8PM on a Thursday night. I'm outside at a cafe table. The dusk is falling slowly on Denver. Lights are coming on. People are settling into their evening. The weekend is so close you can taste it. Dogs are walking their owners. It is spring. Everyone is looking at everyone else. Apes and bears... Claws turning to wings... We've officially come out of our caves. The evening air is palpable. It's carbonated. It has a voice... it's whispering irreverent things into our ears. We're listening this time... It feels like the kind of night that a stranger could walk up to a stranger and say, "The tank is full... wanna drive to Montana? I know this little bar in Butte..."

An oblivious middle aged white guy just walked past on the sidewalk. He had the mild swagger that mild success mixed with uncertainty breeds. He'd been waiting for his middle aged white female friend, evidently. When she walked up, he said something vaguely condescending to her as he adjusted his belt on his paunch. I don't like him. He's not evil. He's just boring.

I've got a lot of things on my mind lately... top of the list is these records... these musical projects that are in my head. I kind of want to take off some time from playing shows, turn my house back into a recording studio and go figure out a new music for myself... more about all that soon... it's still cooking.

Learning to swim... Trip #2

I realize that these triathlon-related posts are INCREDIBLY GEEKY AND BORING. I apologize about that. But honestly, working out 1 - 3 hours a day seven days a week means that it's on my mind a lot... Plus, it's making me do things that are putting me WAY out of my comfort zone... so I guess that's why I'm thinking about it so much... Anyway, ignore it if it's boring... but really, that goes for everything anyway. Right?

===========

So I took my second little trip to the pool today... My second "swim workout", although, calling it that gives it WAY too much legitimacy! I did about ten 25M lengths [not laps (a in, out and back), LENGTHS (as in, out OR back)] stopping after each length to catch my breath. I stopped after each length because I had to!

Here's what I realized today:
- Swimming well seems to be the summation of 30 or 40 subtle, non-intuitive things. This is DEFINITELY NOT a linear sport like lifting weights or pounding out a bike ride.
- I need to slow way down. No, slower. No, seriously... slower.
- There's this neat little place in the middle of each stroke where if you do it right, you glide for like 1 second and it feels REALLY REALLY good... fish-like and not like you're slowly drowning in a clumsy, splashy way. I achieved this "fish state" literally only 3 times during my 10 lengths. That's like 3 strokes out of 500. It needs to be 500 out of 500.
- Hip rotation / movement -- I think this is where it's at, baby. I think it's gonna help everything if I learn to rote my hips each stroke: breathing, length, glide, etc
- The biggest thing that feels out of whack is the relationship between my getting / gulping air, my stroke and my heart and breathing rate. They feel completely disconnected.

That's all for now.

Oh, and yes. I said "fish state".

Monday, May 14, 2007

Swimming... Wow... Square One.

I JUST got back from the pool. Literally, my first swim since I was... Oh, I dunno... 15 years old???

Wow. Talk about humbling. I am a total beginner!!!! (This entire triathlon training thing is nothing if not humbling!)

Okay.... Here's what I did today for my inaugural re-entry... I jumped in, put on my cap and goggles and tried swimming a simple 25M length. Of course, I semi-freaked out (not like, "I'm drowning!" freak out, more like, "I can't breath" freak out). At the far end of the pool. I quieted myself and said, "Okay dude. Go SLOWLY. Keep your head down. Try and be a little sleek/low drag, and just relax." All I wanted to do was swim a single 25M length in a semi-calm way. I did it! So then I tried to do it again. Woo hoo! It's amazing how much of a mental thing it is... to just relax and stay focused. It's odd how easily your heart/breathing rate can get out of control and then your stroke gets out of control and then you're gulping air and treading water in the middle of the pool, feeling like an idiot.

So I'm basically at square one. I'm reaching out to a few friends of mine who are strong/experienced swimmers (one is literally a silver medal winner in swimming from the Olympics in Seoul, Korea). I'm getting some simple drills, tips and mental images that I can focus on....

My triathlon swim will be 750 meters in open water surrounded by 100-200 people kicking me in the head and splashing all around. (That's for a sprint -- i.e. short -- triathlon. Ironman swim distance is 2.4 miles!).

Today is my starting point: a single 25M length.

:-)

Friday, May 11, 2007

I'm probably not built for this... But here goes.

I've been training for a triathlon for the past couple of months.

Like most stories, things didn't all happen at once... I sort of stepped my way into it without knowing what I was truly in for. It all began on the evening of December 31st, 2006. I was standing outside 15th Street Tavern on New Year's Eve. It had just turned midnight and I was sipping my plastic cup filled with Jameson and smoking a cigarette... I thought: "I really need to quit smoking." This was about the 3,079th time I'd said that to myself. (I have a near-constant internal dialogue going with myself.) Evidently, I meant what I said this time.

So I quit drinking first. Which is much easier for me to do, and very helpful to me not smoking. You see, every time I would drink, my mantras, manifestos and private promises would crumble... There are so many good reasons to smoke too... writing, playing music, being out, coffee, driving, on and on... trigger after trigger. Smoking would be SUCH A GREAT ADDICTION if it didn't kill you, ya know? And make your breath gross. And your clothes and hair smell gross. And stain your teeth. But I digress...

No drinking led to no smoking which led to going back to the gym which led to working out 4 or 5 times a week which led to my ultra-healthy, triathlete friend Eliza suggesting I email her "triathlon coach" (this uber fit veteran of umpteen ironmans) which led to me getting him as my coach which is leading to me getting up at 6AM tomorrow morning and going to Cherry Creek Reservoir to do my first DUATHLON (5K run + 30K mile bike + 5K run).

How did this happen? Truth is, I'm having a blast.

Wish me luck.

POST RACE UPDATE:
I did it! my goals were to a) have fun, b) not do anything stupid like crash or get in someone's way, c) try and finish as close to two hours as possible. I did all three! I had a really good time (that 2nd 5K involved a fair amount of suffering however), I didn't do anything stupid and my time was 2 hours and 20 seconds. Hot damn. This could get addicting. Good thing I don't have an addictive personality... er, um... right.

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

another dream... The BEST Flying Dream of My Life

our family and other members of a "small christian church" were having an outdoor service in the high plains somewhere. the landscape looked a lot like how it looks outside of boulder, colorado... tall meadow grasses, gently rolling hills, foothills/mountains in the distance. it was a traditional christian service. we were all sitting in folding chairs, listening to the sermon. my attention started drifting... and then i got up and walked away from the group. i started looking north, away from the church service, out across the plain along a ridge, pointing north and i saw an enormous forest off in the distance... dark, green, filled with HUGE trees... 200 feet tall, creating these grand forest hallways topped by a sun-dappled canopy of leaves and branches. i could feel a soft wind on my face, moving the grass back and forth. and i got the notion that i should try and fly. so i just started running, flapping my hands by my side as hard as I could... and I STARTED FLYING! i absolutely could not believe it. but i didn't have too much time to celebrate... i

saw that i was headed for the power lines that were stretched out above the dirt road i was just running down... using my BRAND NEW flying skills, i crudely and barely avoided the power lines and rose above them, heading north, flying along the ridge line toward the forest. the forest seemed a long ways off, so i just started seeing how fast i could fly... how much altitude i could gain. i was exploring my new flying skills... but cautiously... i didn't know the limits of this new power and it kind of scared me. also, it took SERIOUS EFFORT to fly. imagine how much exertion it would take to run as fast as you can -- that's how much energy i was exerting to fly.

but it was totally working... i was flying at what felt like 120 miles an hour! zooming above the rolling hills on a sunny day toward the forest. wait, i was nearly to the forest now. i was flying so fast that I had covered about 4 or 5 miles in what seemed like only a minute or two. i entered the forest near the canopy at about 200 feet above the forest floor, going about 100 miles an hour. immediately, the temperature dropped. i was covered in shade. it felt exhilarating to fly (still) but i was also VERY aware of the tree trunks, thick branches and leaves zooming past my face and shoulders and flapping arms at 100 miles an hour. i would DEFINITELY either die or get seriously F'ed up if i hit a tree going that fast. i also noticed that flying was seriously tiring me out. it is AN ASS-KICKING WORKOUT to fly, trust me.

when i entered the forest, flying, it was like i had entered a great wide hallway made of huge, majestic trees. they must have each been hundreds of years old. as i flew deeper into the forest though, the wide of this great hall rapidly narrowed and by the time i realized what was happening, i saw that i didn't have enough room to do a wide, arcing turn and head back out of the forest safely. the walls of the forest had narrowed to the point that i didn't know how i was doing to turn around... and the walls kept getting more and more narrow. and the canopy above me prevented me from just flying out the top of the forest. i had flown myself into a narrowing box. i was most definitely going to slam into a tree in a matter of seconds. also, i realized that i was getting very, very tired from flying. i had to make a decision quickly.

so i gained as much altitude as i could without flying into the canopy and i just sort of turned my body around in mid-air and starting flapping and kicking with ALL OF MY MIGHT in the opposite direction. i immediately slowed down and began falling to the forest floor. oh my god was this exhausting! imagine going from 100 miles and hour and then trying to go 100 miles an hour in the opposite direction, fighting all of that momentum. i saw that i was going to crash right into the dirt and roots of the forest floor -- an ugly crash -- so i kicked and flapped even harder...

i BARELY missed the floor... it was completely gut-wrenching, but i had done what i thought was impossible... i had turned around and was flying back out of the forest canyon... i felt incredible and very happy. like i had dodged a bullet. but i was completely exhausted now. i was sweating like crazy and wasted tired. i wasn't sure that I could make it all the way back to the family out there on the plains. so as i was flying, i started looking for a branch to land on. i found one and started flying toward it, slowing down, hoping that i could do a semi-controlled "tree landing" like a bird does.

as i got close to the tree branch, i saw scott (my brother!) flying toward me. he was headed into the same canyon that I had just flown into. i yelled at him... 'Hey scott! it's me! slow down! land on this branch!" he did. when we saw each other, in the tree, we both started freaking out with each other about the fact that we both had just learned how to fly and how amazing it was that we saw each other in the forest at the same moment. we were both really, really tired too. it felt good to be sitting down and not flying... we were about 100 feet up in the air, clinging to a tree, just checking out the forest. we looked down at the forest floor way below us and saw people walking around, like what you'd see if you looked down at a small tourist town... people milling around, shopping, eating at outdoor cafes...

scott and i started weighing our options... we could jump out of the tree and hope that we could flap and kick hard enough to accelerate and start flying before we hit the forest floor, or we could climb down the tree and walk out of the forest. we were both really, really tired, but we also weren't quite ready to give up the idea of flying out of the forest. the dream ended with us both looking down, looking out, gauging our courage, trying to make a decision.