Wednesday, October 10, 2007

The guy in the back seat is talking to me.

I had this dream a while ago... And I've learned that when I have really weird dreams, you know the ones -- the DOOZIES -- I've learned to write those down. And man... I've had some DOOZIES over the past year or so.

Yikes.

It's a more than a little unsettling when you get a peak into your own subconscious... And you see how much dark, weird, creative power is there... just under the surface. It's like taking a long road trip -- all alone in your car -- across the country. And somewhere in Iowa, just as the sun is setting behind the corn, you turn around to look at that old abandoned farm house as it whizzes past and you see a well-dressed stranger sitting in the back seat (your subconscious) quietly smiling back at you. It makes you think... "Christ! How long as HE been there? Why didn't he speak up?"

Kind of freaks you out.

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The Dream


I dreamt that I was dating a doctor… We were in the early stage of a new relationship… just beginning, but definitely into each other.

The next image was me standing in the shower and I noticed a knot or some sort of bump on my lower chest… I started feeling it with my hand trying to figure out what it was... it felt like some foreign body was inside me, just under the skin. So I kept fiddling around and pulled it out… I don’t remember what it was... some sort of knot -- like you'd see in a tree trunk. Then, when I looked down again, I saw that a gap, almost a slice had opened up from the top of my chest all the way down to my crotch – nearly in the center of my body… This is gross… but my entire abdomen had a huge slice/opening/gap in it! It was like I was wearing a button down shirt with none of the buttons fastened – only it was my body. When I looked down, I could see directly inside my body – I could see my internal organs.

It FREAKED ME OUT.

So the next scene was me walking into my doctor/girlfriend’s office – kind of interrupting her at work so that she could diagnose what the fuck was going on with me. She examined the split in my chest… Looking at me with a sad, terminal expression on her face she said, “You have New Half Disease.”


New Half Disease.

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Then I woke up. And I googled "New Half Disease". Nothing. No relevant search results. It’s a fictitious disease that the guy in the back seat came up with... A figment of my dream life, evidently.

I hesitate to do this, but feel free to comment with your dream interpretations on this one.

And go.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

New Half Disease

Characterized by the spliting open of one's chest after ripping out your own heart, leaving a gaping wound open to hurt.

Sounds to me, in my couch psychologist opinion, as a fear of emotionally getting close to a new person in your life for fear of leaving yourself open to hurt.

Classic Scorpio. More graphically pictured than most, but classic scorpio.

Would have made a great Frida Khalo painting too.

Unknown said...

what did you eat before you fell asleep? sounds a little like ancient chinese eggroll wisdom.

Julie said...

Hmm. I think the diagnosis, "New Half Disease," is significant. Dreams often reveal what we suppress with our conscious mind, so, maybe you have been suppressing an urge to explore another side of yourself (your new half) because it could hurt.

Do you remember your reoccurring dream of your teeth falling out? Didn't Freud interpret that as you hiding something, or not being honest about something? Maybe you have a deep dark secret which you are not letting out and this is just another squeak of that secret. What are you hiding, John?

Additionally, I believe you have a (common) fear of death or aging. It seems that the dreams which stand out to you are the ones involving bodily harm-- as if in real life you believe you're invincible or something. Maybe you need to spend some time learning to accept your mortality?

And just for the record, I agree with c.c. miranda re: the Frida painting. Maybe you should try your hand at paining this since she can't!